When the dust settles: a cancer carer's artistic journey

The male carer in western white middle class society is a non-traditional role. The conundrum for the male carer is the accepted masculine non reluctance to discuss health concerns. Compared to study concerning the experiences of female carers, academic research with male carers is woefully lacking. My primary care role as husband and father has been to our family together during the often, brutal cancer journey. A conventional model of masculinity inhibits some men from expressing their emotional responses to assaults on the body. Quite a few men may judge it unmanly to discuss medical procedures that can unman them. Is this stoicism empowering or disabling? Men unaccustomed to sharing their qualms and questions are especially vulnerable when undergoing cancer or another appalling ordeal. Obviously bottling up emotion is not good, for the sufferer or carer and leads to anxiety, frustration and anger. The male carer needs to find a way to give voice to feelings, write them down, talk to the therapist, or as I have done, paint.